If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher.
Pema ChodronFeelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that weโre holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel weโd rather collapse and back away. Theyโre like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where weโre stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, itโs with us wherever we are.
Pema ChodronIn tonglen practice, when we see or feel suffering, we โฏbreathe in with the notion of completely feeling it, accepting it, and owning it. Then we breathe out, radiating compassion, lovingkindness, freshness - anything that encourages relaxation and openness.โฏ So you're training in softening, rather than tightening, your heart. In this practice, it's not uncommon to find yourself blocked, because you come face to face with your own fear, resistance, or whatever your personal "stuckness" happens to be at that moment.
Pema Chodron