We think that by protecting ourselves from suffering, we are being kind to ourselves. The truth is we only become more fearful, more hardened and more alienated. We experience ourselves as being separate from the whole. This separateness becomes like a prison for us - a prison that restricts us to our personal hopes and fears, and to caring only for the people nearest to us. Curiously enough, if we primarily try to shield ourselves from discomfort, we suffer. Yet, when we don't close off, when we let our hearts break, we discover our kinship with all beings.
Pema ChodronBy becoming intimate with how we close down and how we open up, we awaken our unlimited potential.
Pema ChodronA thoroughly good relationship with ourselves results in being still, which doesn't mean we don't run and jump and dance about. It means there's no compulsiveness. We don't overwork, overeat, oversmoke, overseduce. In short, we begin to stop causing harm.
Pema ChodronDonโt worry about achieving. Donโt worry about perfection. Just be there each moment as best you can.
Pema ChodronWe insist on being Someone, with a capital S. We get security from defining ourselves as worthless or worthy, superior or inferior. We waste precious time exaggerating or romanticizing or belittling ourselves with a complacent surety that yes, thatโs who we are. We mistake the openness of our beingโthe inherent wonder and surprise of each momentโfor a solid, irrefutable self. Because of this misunderstanding, we suffer.
Pema Chodron