Gays feel about popularity the same way teenage girls do. Is it that we really want friends we can count on, or do we just want guys around us whom we can share our curlers with?

Realize the complicated specials of what we call the "inferiority complex." In other words, what, Miss Thing, is so damn special about you to make you feel so specially inferior to any other jerk?

Try to dwell on the people you'd like to love, instead of all the people you do loathe.

Stay up and listen to lightening. If there is no lightening around, stay up and listen to nothing. Just listen to the sheer joy of your thoughts trans-versing from one corner of your brain to the next.

Take up something that you know will never bring you any returns except pleasure-in other words, allow yourself to live the way brilliant eighteenth century courtesans lived. Don't be afraid of having a decorative life, even if all the decorations come from you.

We think of death and loss as tragic twins, but in fact it is loss that hurts us.

Don't waste your love on stupid people. Anyone stupid enough to deny or reject it-in the midst of the Love Depression we're in-does not deserve it.