Remember that that "rude awakening" which your parents and well-meaning relatives threatened you with as a kid is better than no awakening at all.

Get out of your house in the middle of a rainstorm, get soaked in it, and then strip down-to nothing but a smile.

Realize the complicated specials of what we call the "inferiority complex." In other words, what, Miss Thing, is so damn special about you to make you feel so specially inferior to any other jerk?

To extend oneself does not necessarily mean to have an erection.

Fashion is the art of making the unimportant indispensable.

There are two things in life that money cannot buy: health and happiness. Aside from that, it does an excellent job.

Although computers allow people to talk at the speed of light, no one talks that fast.