A real man don't call the plumbers. If he gonna call himself a man, he needs to know how to fix it, on the spot

If men were in charge of carrying and birthing our babies, we'd have a lot fewer people on Earth, because we'd only do it once- I can promise you that!

Our founding fathers started this country and built it on God and His Word, and this country sure would be a better place to live and raise our children if we still followed their ideals and beliefs.

Women with whiskers... its a bummer.

Actually, most people don't think I have too much sense because I would rather be fairly intelligent and act dumb instead of not having any sense at all and try to act smart.

Kids in America today are overweight and lazy, and it's their parents fault for letting it happen.

I'm with the blacks, because we’re white trash. We’re going across the field … They’re singing and happy. I never heard one of them, one black person, say, ‘I tell you what: These doggone white people’ - not a word!