Well, it has done terrifying things. Religious ideas are inflammatory in a way that I find difficult to understand. There are very few wars over the theory of relativity. Very few heated arguments, for that matter. Whereas, in Northern Ireland, they are killing one another over religion.

The consuming desire of most human beings is deliberately to plant their whole life in the hands of some other person. I would describe this method of searching for happiness as immature. Development of character consists solely in moving toward self-sufficiency.

The Scots are very hospitable; almost as hospitable as the Americans.

Quentin Crisp (to handsome young man on the street): "What's the matter, sexy? Don't you like dehydrated fruit?

The English think that incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.

I am asked how to remain young, and I say 'Never, never work.' And that, of course, is the secret of it.

Nowadays people don't use face powder; they say it dries the skin. But I makeup in the old-fashioned way.