The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another.

The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy; they want to be right.

I am told that you regret not what you did but what you didn't do; and so that's why I do everything, so as not to have any regrets.

When asked, 'Shall I tell my mother I'm gay?', I reply, 'Never tell your mother anything.

I have to work in England, but here in America you don't have to work. You can sort of enter the profession of being.

Nothing in our culture, not even home computers, is more overrated than the epidermal felicity of two featherless bipeds in desperate congress.

If you describe things as better than they are, you are considered to be a romantic; if you describe things as worse than they are, you will be called a realist; and if you describe things exactly as they are, you will be thought of as a satirist.