Eve: Shut up, we have zero time for you and your bullshit dramatics Monica: Or what, you'll bleed on me, Emo Princess of Freakdomonia? Claire: Fine. You come with us. If you get in my way, I'll kill you.

My vampire boss, who would like to maybe be my boyfriend, just dropped in to tell me he was running away because Morganville’s too dangerous.

Shane - "Tell you what: you can be Glammera the vampire hunter. I'll stick with being manly and heavily armed.

Where are you going?” “To get a Coke!” “Would you—” “No!

I feel safer with my old enemy beside me.

Marriage is a big word for all guys,” Shane said. “You know that. It’s kind of an allergy. We get itchy and sweaty just trying to spell it, much less do it.

Don’t,” Michael said. It was soft, and it was a warning, through and through. “You try to hurt her again and I’ll pull your arm off.