Some fools in the desert with nothing to do...invented me, and they invented you. And other fools keep it all going and growing. Everybody, we're a figment of their imagination.

I am not overlooking any mail. I'm looking at all of it. I even wrote back to the Viagra people.

I have owned and played a Steinway all my life. It's the best Beethoven piano. The best Chopin piano. And the best Ray Charles piano. I like it, too.

Things aren't black and white in the world.

Most of my songs are about insensitivity of some kind.

Crank up the Beach Boys, Baby.

The radio is blastin', someone's knockin' at the door. I'm lookin' at my girlfriend, she's passed out on the floor.