I'm not a real programmer. I throw together things until it works then I move on. The real programmers will say Yeah it works but you're leaking memory everywhere. Perhaps we should fix that. I'll just restart Apache every 10 requests.

I don't like programming. It's tedious.

When the world becomes standard, I will start caring about standards.

There are people who actually like programming. I dont understand why they like programming.

For all the folks getting excited about my quotes. Here is another - Yes, I am a terrible coder, but I am probably still better than you :)

I've never thought of PHP as more than a simple tool to solve problems.

I don't know how to stop it, there was never any intent to write a programming language [...] I have absolutely no idea how to write a programming language, I just kept adding the next logical step on the way.