I remembered a time when my grandmother had asked me to explain television to her - the guts, not the funny pictures. There are things which cannot be taught in ten easy lessons, nor popularized for the masses; they take years of skull sweat. This be treason in an age when ignorance has come into its own and one man's opinion is as good as another's. But there it is. As Star says, the world is what it is - and doesn't forgive ignorance.

My old man taught me two things: 'Mind own business' and 'Always cut cards.'

I have spent too much of my life opening doors for cats—I once calculated that, since the dawn of civilization, nine hundred and seventy-eight man-centuries have been used up that way. I could show you figures.

The mind's ability to rationalize it's own shortcomings is unlimited; I am no exception.

Aside from a cold appreciation of my own genius I felt that I was a modest man.

My vocal cords lived their own life, wild and free.

A family reunion is an effective form of birth control.