Life is a vale of tears in which there are moments you just can't stop giggling.

Stored away in some brain cell is the image of a long-departed aunt you haven't thought of in 30 years. Stored away in another cell is the image of a pink pony stitched on your first set of baby pajamas. All it takes to get that aunt mounted on the back of that pony is to eat a hunk of meatloaf immediately before going to bed.

Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie.

Always laugh off a slight insult, so that people will understand what it means when you're not laughing.

The trick to getting things done is to list things to do in doable order.

I don't believe you really know God if you do not recognize His sense of humor.

How do you tell an optimist that he or she has lived a happy life by mistake?