A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is like the Mafia getting together to bump off the Godfather for not going to church on Sunday.

Scientists have been struck by the fact that things that break down virtually never get lost, while things that get lost hardly ever break down.

In America, it is sport that is the opiate of the masses.

My natural instinct after doing something shameful is not to rush into the street boasting about it but to put on dark glasses and head for the next county, hoping nobody notices I've been in the neighborhood.

Schoolteachers seemed determined to persuade me that 'classic' is a synonym for 'narcotic'.

Sending grown-ups up the wall is one of the things adolescence is all about. A few years ago it was done with rock 'n' roll music. Now at least they can do it quietly with a home computer.

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.