Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the public, to its loss, reads very little of it.

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

Of all the people expressing their mental vacuity, none has a better excuse for an empty head than the newspaperman: If he pauses to restock his brain, he invites onrushing deadlines to trample him flat. Broadcasting the contents of empty minds is what most of us do most of the time, and nobody more relentlessly than I.

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Humans treat time as a map and always know where they are located on it and respond with the appropriate emotion.

It was Queen Elizabeth who made me a foreign correspondent.

In writing, punctuation plays the role of body language. It helps readers hear you the way you want to be heard.