As for consulting a dentist regularly, my punctuality practically amounted to a fetish. Every twelve years I would drop whatever I was doing and allow wild Caucasian ponies to drag me to a reputable orthodontist.

"In France," Marcel said with wintry dignity, "accidents occur in the bedroom, not the kitchen."

I found the pearl of the Orient slightly less exciting than a rainy Sunday evening in Rochester.

We old roosters must be cautious. Don't try to outwit your arteries.

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring.

If, at the close of business each evening, I myself can understand what I've written, I feel the day hasn't been totally wasted.

This medal (the National Book Award) together with my American Express card, will identify me worldwide ... except at Bloomingdale's.