I believe in myself. I believe in my vision, my life, my talent, my art. More than anyone. No one can take that away from me.

I sat on the bench outside of class today and talked to Jon. I read to him from my journal, it was the part about the accordian player I was watching on the street last weekend. He said that an accordian is such a perfect metaphor for Love, because you are always opening, and closing, shifting, and getting air, and that's how the music happens. True.

I think God leaves me alone to let me find my own strength because no one else can give it to me. Sometimes it is very lonely. But I know the lonely times teach me the most. I must let go in order to let anything in. No one can love me, for me.

You've got this amazing creature- yourself- that can breathe, dance, and cry. And you have a certain amount of moments (maybe a few million moments-but moments they are) and you have this chance to do absolutely anything- to reach out to another vulnerable & true. To dance on the roof of euphoria and pray beside the ocean to let go. We have the chance every moment to Be Alive and give to this world who needs each one of us so badly.

We are all carrying so many things in our life and inside ourselves. Often it feels there is no place to put them down. Where do you place the questions you carry

MUCKY drawing I AM FeeLing completely mucky today too. everyone at school seems so much tougher + pulled together and not so emotionally involved. I get so mad at MYSELF FOR 'caring so deeply' AND 'MAINTAINING' all this stuff in me that FEELS SO PATHectic. I want to put my tHINKing in HYBernation FOR A WHile.

I feel quite lost INSIDE myself, like I'm looking for my train tracks for my life, as if they would just appear and solve the growing questions I seem to face (my reflection in the morning).