Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.

They say the test of literary power is whether a man can write an inscription. I say, "Can he name a kitten?"

In old times people used to try and square the circle; now they try and devise schemes for satisfying the Irish nation.

If I die prematurely at any rate I shall be saved from being bored to death by my own success.

For truth is precious and divine, too rich a pearl for carnal swine.

The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore.

Men are seldom more commonplace than on supreme occasions.