As soon as I realized you could be funny as a job, that was the job I wanted.

I'm actually way more funny now, because I'm hungry... If comedy comes from pain, I should be funnier now than I ever was.

I feel no sympathy for my food.

It's much more painful to bomb in front of a group of yours peers than it is to not win. Tons of assholes ain't winning awards, but only one guy will be bombing. So, that's much more nerve-wracking.

There was a year straight where every weekend, I went to at least one bar mitzvah or bat mitzvah, and we would all go, and it was a lot of fun. We sneak some beer; we'd hang out; we would try to get with girls and not. And usually we'd just end up hanging out together alone.

It's definitely not true what they say about women wanting a guy with a sense of humour. What women mean is that they want a guy with a sense of humour who is really handsome. If a girl had a choice between Brad Pitt or me, she'd pick Brad Pitt. And I'm a lot funnier than he is.

It was a great time. We did hurt ourselves [on Pineapple Express set]. [James] Franco cracked his face open.[Danny ] McBride cracked the back of his head open. I punched Amber[Heard] in the face just to get her in the mood for things. 'Welcome to the set!' But it was a lot of fun. I loved it.