If he wants to get that next contract, he's going to have to go to the New York Athletic Club three times a day and just ride the bike.

That dude scored 8 points in the last 19 seconds, pulled out a miracle win at the Garden. He made me choke on a chicken bone that day. I'm serious.

In this millennium that we live in, the 'Hack-a-Shaq'has proven not to work. It might work a couple games every now and then, but when it comes to the playoffs or a championship series, it doesn't work - not at all.

I would like to be referred to as 'The Big Aristotle'.

I feel like Bill Walton - old and shitty.

How did Mike Bibby get on the team? Any Cub Scout with Boy Scouts can do Boy Scoutish things. When Bibby was in the Cub Scouts, he was a Cub Scout. When he was with Vancouver, nobody heard about him. Now that he's with Sacramento... he's on the team. I ain't going.

I've won at every level, except college and pro.