Euphemisms are for the differently brained.
It's always coldest before the warm.
It took a couple of hundred million years to develop a thinking ape and you want a smart one in a lousy few hundred thousand?
To be human : to strive in the face of the certainty of failure.
Man, you're no smarter than me. You're just a fancier kind of stupid.
Librarians are like crack dealers when it comes to hooking small children.