The first requisite for immortality is death.

Thoughts, like fleas, jump from man to man. But they don't bite everybody.

Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's; and unto God the things that are God's; and unto human beings, what?

Here lies William Trollope, Who made these stones roll up; When death took his soul up, His body filled this hole up

The window to the world can be covered by a newspaper.

Whenever man begins to doubt himself, he does something so stupid that he is reassured.

Advice to writers: Sometimes you just have to stop writing. Even before you begin.