I abhor crime novels in which the main character can behave however he or she pleases, or do things that normal people do not do, without those actions having social consequences.

Dear Government... I'm going to have a serious talk with you if I ever find anyone to talk to.

Martin was dafter than a syphilitic polecat - where do I get these metaphors from?

Men who just call to say hello generally have ulterior motives.

...you have no idea how mentally handicapped I could be if push comes to shove.

I don't know if I want a steady relationship, but I'm terrified of losing you.

When their love was not reciprocated, it could quickly turn to violent hatred.