Estate agents: like them or loathe them, you'd be mad not to loathe them.
The service took place on one of those afternoons that occur only in the past.
[...] I suppose this was the first time I had ever felt an urge not to be. Never an urge to die, far less an urge to put an end to myself - simply an urge not to be. This disgusting, hostile and unlovely world was not made for me, nor I for it. It was alien to me and I to it.
I get an urge, like a pregnant elephant, to go away and give birth to a book.
I think faith in each other is much harder than faith in God...
The other man's arse is always cleaner!