It's actually against my religion to laugh at men who are toting guns.

The world, although well-lighted with fluorescents and incandescent bulbs and neon, is still full of odd dark corners and unsettling nooks and crannies.

I watched Titanic when I got back home from the hospital, and cried. I knew that my IQ had been damaged.

They were close to the end of the beginning . . .

If you can't laugh when things go bad--laugh and put on a little carnival--then you're either dead or wishing you were.

On the day of my judgment, when I stand before God, and He asks me why did I kill one of his true miracles, what am I gonna say? That it was my job? My job?

We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones.