I think if you try to look for something to show off as an actor, vanity can get the better of you.

I'm 47, my girlfriend's 33; she's 14 years younger than me: Back of the net!

Two thousand years ago, the Holy family had a ramble from Nazareth to Bethlehem - in much the same way as I'm having a ramble from Norwich to Swaffham. Although I'm not comparing myself to Jesus - I don't want to get bogged down in that whole controversy again.

I like the transience of Klimt paintings.

Actually, bizarrely, in America, I get more appreciation from the odd, unusual stuff I've done, almost because I'm not, if you like, famous in America as I am in England.

What terrifies me is that I might somehow endorse that view so people think they don't have to read books anymore.

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny, you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny.