After one of my plays came out, I had mixed reviews, some bad and some good. One day, it dawned on me. I thought, 'I wrote a play and he wrote a review, and that's the difference between him and me.'

The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.

You know what your problem is, it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all of life's riddles are answered in the movies.

Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!

She was feeling her bohemian oats.

Somewhere in the world is...The world's worst doctor and he could be yours.

She didn't even finish her last sentence; it just trailed off. I think the subject had changed in her head while her mouth had continued on the old topic, not realizing it was out of supplies.