People like me prove that you can survive without romance, even though you end up a bit unbalanced and you tend to argue with your own reflection.

All human activity is fruitless when pitted against the girls and boys singing on pop television, for they have found the answer as the rest of us search for the question. I will sing, too. If not, I will have to die.

Now I know how Joan of Arc felt.

I always thought my genitals were the result of some crude practical joke.

You have to, at least from a distance, look as if you know what you're doing, and I can manage that.

I began to go to concerts when I was 12 years old. And I would stand there, the small imp that I was, and I would expect the world to be laid before me by these artists, and in some cases it was. So when I climbed onto the stage, I always imagined that I was singing to somebody who was similar to how I had been.

When they bury me in a church and chuck earth on my grave, I'd like the words 'Well, at least he tried' engraved on my tombstone.