We often marvel at how introverted, geeky, kid 'blossom' into secure and happy adults. We liken it to a metamorphosis. However, maybe it's not the children who change but their environments. As adults they get to select the careers, spouses, and social circles that suit them. They don't have to live in whatever culture they'er plunked into.
Susan CainI think the shyness one feels in childhood is often overcome with time. There are children who hide behind their parents' legs, but you don't see grown-ups hiding behind people. It just doesn't happen. I mean, not that often. People develop social skills over time.
Susan CainThe pressure to entertain, to sell ourselves, and never to be visibly anxious keeps ratcheting up.
Susan Cain.. it makes sense that introverts are uniquely good at leading intiative-takers. Because of their inclination to listen to others and lack of interest in dominating social situations, introverts are more likely to hear and implement suggestions. Having benefited from the talents of their followers, they are then likely to motivate them to be even more proactive. Introverted leaders create a virtious circle of proactivity.
Susan CainShyness is inherently uncomfortable; introversion is not. The traits do overlap, though psychologists debate to what degree.
Susan CainWhen you go to a football game and someone offers you a beer [...], they're really saying hi, have a glass of extroversion.
Susan CainThe emphasis is on community, on participating in more and more programs and events, on meeting more and more people. Itโs a constant tension for many introverts that theyโre not living that out. And in a religious world, thereโs more at stake when you feel that tension. It doesnโt feel like โIโm not doing as well as Iโd like.โ It feels like โGod isnโt pleased with me.โ
Susan Cain