Ironic, isn't it, what religion does to people?" "I guess it's more ironic what people do to religion.

You remind me of someone with a bad toothache who's hitting herself in the head with a hammer to distract herself from the pain in her mouth.

You have a college degree? You can barely talk.

I can’t chitchat and make breakfast at the same time. You could help, you know, instead of standing there like the Queen of England. Although you’re a lot better-looking.

Why don't I just hand you my panties and be done with it.

Hey, everybody, Jerry Maguire's here.

Get inside before I spank you in public." There it was again, another of his maddening threats. Did that mean he wouldn't spank her if she did as he said or that he simply planned to spank her in private? She was still mulling over the whole unpleasant concept when he started the truck.