She had the kind of looks that had probably been quite pretty in high school, but were now worn down by years of smoking cigarettes, raising children, and the disappointment of being married to an asshole.

But then I had long mistaken being spoiled for being strong, being defiant for being independent, being reckless for being brave.

They don't matter. I thought I had to prove something, and I did, to myself. There's nothing left for me to prove. I can move on with my life.

In a lifestyle where there are no boundaries, it becomes a challenge to find one's true self. If everything comes easily, there is no way to establish worth. And if nothing has real value, then there is no way to gauge satisfaction or accomplishment or contentment.

Minnesotans hate zeal. Zeal is right up there on the list of suspicious emotional behaviors like joy and despair. Always err on the side of blandness.

Family was a fertile breeding ground for the kind of psychological bacteria that warped minds and devoured hope.

I'm telling you, you did what you believed you had to do through all of this. Not what was easiest or best for you. You did what you did, and you're owning it. And I don't know ten men who would be brave enough to do that.