I don't hold with paddlin' with the occult," said Granny firmly. "Once you start paddlin' with the occult you start believing in spirits, and when you start believing in spirits you start believing in demons, and then before you know where you are you're believing in gods. And then you're in trouble." "But all them things exist," said Nanny Ogg. "That's no call to go around believing in them. It only encourages 'em.

They say that there can never be two snowflakes that are exactly alike, but has anyone checked lately?

Never build a dungeon you wouldn't be happy to spend the night in yourself. The world would be a happier place if more people remembered that.

I'm fairy godmothering a girl who sounds like something you put up in the rain.

Creators aren't gods. They make places, which is quite hard. It's men that make gods. This explains a lot.

I became a journalist at 17. A few hours later, I saw my first dead body, which was somewhat... colourful. That's when I learned you can go on throwing up after you run out of things to throw up.

Goodness is about what you do. Not who you pray to.