He'd heard that writers spent all day in their dressing gowns drinking champagne. This is, of course, absolutely true.

And he dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.

A true beanie should have a propellor on the top.

This book was written using 100% recycled words.

Are you a philosopher? Where's your sponge?

The Captain of the Watch says if you're still in the City by sunrise he will personally have you buried alive.

It takes forty men with their feet on the ground to keep one man with his head in the air.