No one knew where you were before you were born, but when you were born, it wasn't long before you found you'd arrived with your return ticket already punched.

All the higher life forms scythed away, just like that. [ . . . ] Nothing but dust and fundamentalists.

[Science fiction is] out in the mainstream now. You can tell by the way mainstream literary authors pillage SF while denying they're writing it!

It as true that normal people couldn't hear Gaspode speak, because dogs don't speak. It's a well know fact. ... Besides, almost all dogs don't talk. Ones that do are merely a statistical error, and can therefore be ignored.

Nanny Ogg looked under her bed in case there was a man there. Well, you never knew your luck.

Vimes struggled to his feet, shook his head and set off after it. No thought was involved. It is the ancient instinct of terriers and policemen to chase anything that runs away.

Never cross a woman with a star on a stick, young lady. They've got a mean streak.