A push-and-go wooden duck on wheels can cause quite a lot of damage if wielded with enough force.

What did they feed the lions and tigers with in the ark, sir?

So let's not get frightened when the children read fantasy. It's the compost for a healthy mind. It stimulate s the inquisitive nodes, and there is some evidence that a rich internal fantasy life is as good and necessary for a child as healthy soil is for a plant, for much the same reasons.

Welcome to fear, said Moist to himself. It's hope, turned inside out. You know it can't go wrong, you're sure it can't go wrong... But it might.

The brain works fast when it thinks it’s about to be cut in half.

I'm glad a genre writer has got a knighthood, but stunned that it was me.

Many an ancient lord's last words have been, 'You can't kill me because I've got magic aaargh.'