Chicken Little change my life when I was younger. I had no idea chickens could talk *laughs*.

I'm banned from Middlebrook elementary for telling dirty jokes to the janitor. The janitor! He cleans up dirt for a living.

Your fantasies are unlikely. But beautiful.

I see fat kids on the street all the time and I give them free radiohead t-shirts with bullseyes on them. Later when I see them wearing the t-shirts I shoot at them with bb guns while riding a very large dog and singing kicking squealing gucci little piggy over and over

Being in a band turns you into a child and keeps you there.

My heart is a weatherballoon caught in an updraft of a chinese tax percentage, the tax percentages are unequivocaaaaaaaaaal, Unequivocaaaaaaaaal. This is the sort of lyrics you could never think of, loser. Here's a razorblade go cut yourself

If you Americans aren't from the stone age then explain to me how your president is a ****ing pterodactyl