Not many people have had as much bad luck as I have, but not many people have had as much good luck, either.

Not many people have had as much bad luck as I have, but not many people have had as much good luck, either.

I was talking and playing pranks and skipping school, failing pretty much every class I took.

I didn't know what my fate was as far as being alive.

I can't imagine just dusting my pants off and going about my life like, "Phew! I sure made it through a tough spot, now where am I headed?" I feel more of an obligation to be helpful.

In movies, you just see somebody close their eyes, and you go on to the next scene.

I really wanted to, but I just didn't understand how people became comedians. I kind of thought it was something you were born into. And so I wanted to be a veterinarian or an architect. I wanted to be in a band, and for some reason I could understand how you could be in a band because I had guitars and all my friends played music. Comedy was a secret want, but it wasn't anything I pursued.