I was really into music. I started playing guitar also when I was nine. I wanted to be in the Beatles, even though John Lennon died the year I got a guitar and the Beatles broke up before I was born.

Everybody, male or female, needs to possess qualities that they expect others to uphold. Being aware of yourself and your actions allows you to assess your shortcomings in an honest way.

I think my brain just has a natural way of going to what would be the most insane thing, the least likely option.

It's not the child's responsibility to teach the parent who they are. It's the parent's responsibility to learn who the child is.

I really wanted to, but I just didn't understand how people became comedians. I kind of thought it was something you were born into. And so I wanted to be a veterinarian or an architect. I wanted to be in a band, and for some reason I could understand how you could be in a band because I had guitars and all my friends played music. Comedy was a secret want, but it wasn't anything I pursued.

I didn't know what my fate was as far as being alive.

As soon as I say I'm from Texas people say, "Oh, I'm sure the school was horrible" and they picture me wearing some barrel and suspenders and people are bucktoothed and ignoring me. But that's not the case. I just had zero interest. I wanted to finish my research in the woods or play guitar or go have a cigarette.