It doesn't matter if it's a school play or a dumb TV show. It's your work. You should care about it so much that people get annoyed with you.

I feel like there is a lot of inherent humor in the stress and insanity surrounding that process. People lose their minds, trying to prove their parental worth by getting their children into one of five colleges; when there are thousands of good colleges across the United States - and elsewhere.

I am going to dedicate myself, full time, to my day-drinking.

Most of my work is done before we start shooting, preparation work, so my normal day begins when I start writing, it might even be the night before.

You have to remember that actors are human beings. Which is hard sometimes because they look so much better than human beings.

If these two are tired of having sex with each other, what hope is there for the rest of us?

In an interview, Paris Hilton said that of her and her sister, "People love to hate us. But when you know us, you love us. And if you really get to know us, you get gonorrhea."