I really like the Observer. I think I'd love to have a column with a broad reach that would enable me to do some proper reporting, but keep it on sort of a humorous level. I've always had a very happy experience writing for them.

I was every Londoner's stereotypical idea of a brash, vulgar American. When I got here, it turned out that London was the Wild West, and New York was like London at the height of the Victorian era, in which everyone was far more obsessed with table manners and status-climbing than they are in London. In London, everyone was just crawling over this blizzard of cocaine. Here, if you have more than a glass of wine with your meal, people refer you to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Everyone said to me growing up, "You're like an American. You have to go to America. That's your spiritual home."

Oddly, I do have a problem with authority. I find it very difficult to knuckle down and follow rules. Which are the classic symptoms of someone who has a troubled relationship with their father. And yet, I never had a problem with my father.

Top Chef is a very smooth-running machine. All the people working there are incredibly professional and absolutely at the top of their game.

I don't envy young Brits crossing the Atlantic to make their fortunes today.

There's no reason why you can't deliver a grammar-school curriculum to an all-ability intake.