Do what you like and do it honestly.

Spending so much time on the road, I get to fart all the time. Then when it's, like, Thanksgiving dinner and I'm sitting with my grandmother, I can't fart for, like, two hours.

I used to drink a lot of beer, but I was just getting fat as can be. Now that we've had a little success, I can afford to drink wine.

I've masturbated like 5 times in the last 24 hours... it hurts... it's going to fall off.

You'll always see me doing things that I have no business doing. Whether it's directing a major motion picture or meeting with the most important people in government and dealing with the biggest subjects on Earth. The story of the millennia. These are things I aspire to tackle. It doesn't mean I'm going to win on all of them, but God damn, it looks like I've got a pretty good shot at it.

I love to deliver orgasms to the masses!

You should follow your passions, you know? And you should make sure you do something you love. That's all I've learned, is that if you're doing something you love you'll work harder at it and make it happen, I can promise you that.