I think I always enjoyed the energy of a crowd, of being onstage. It started when I was even younger doing public speaking at school and just kept going from there.

I think I always enjoyed the energy of a crowd, of being onstage. It started when I was even younger doing public speaking at school and just kept going from there.

Everyone knows that senior citizens are stupid

I'm no more a lawbreaker than they are , and if they were lawbreakers for keeping God's commandments, they're my example.

It's hard to have any moral authority over a group of drunken college students when you have never had a beer and never been laid.

Everybody gets inspired by different things. I grew up wanting to go up the street with a video camera because I liked watching David Letterman yell out of the ninth floor of Rockefeller Center with a megaphone at people on the street. I thought that was a riot.

I considered myself a professional comedian because the club would pay me $20.