At any given time, ninety-nine-point-nine-five per cent of the human race are a confounded nuisance

After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot

Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try.

New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

In spite of really intense competition for the job, I'm still my own worst enemy.

The best definition of an immortal is someone who hasn't died yet.