What am I afraid of? The IRS. Thats it. I dont want those people knockin on my door, man.

I don't take any relationships for granted and I won't ever again. I just enjoy life.

The truth is if I had a gay son, I would love him just as much as if he was straight… I might have to try to love even more because I know of the difficulty that he would have in society.

A stand-up's job is to hold the mirror up to society and to look at what we're afraid of. That's why we had shows like 'All in the Family' and 'The Jeffersons.' We made fun of ourselves then.

Fame doesn't matter. Money doesn't matter. Those things are forever fleeting. I just want to have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, so that when I'm long gone my great-great-grandchildren can walk up to it and say, "That's my ancestor." That will be my legacy.

I just want to be funny, I just want to do comedy.

I'm old, and so busy with work, that I like to just stay home and get my sleep now. I try not to burn both ends of the candle.