One night a father overheard his son pray: Dear God, make me the kind of man my Daddy is. Later that night, the father prayed, Dear God, make me the kind of man my son wants me to be.

The love of my life is the love between friends.

Keep talking about me behind my back, and watch God keep blessing me in front of your face.

A friend is someone who can see the truth and pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else.

'Tis sweet to kiss a girl on Spring's first day, but only half so sweet as 'tis to kiss a girl on her bootyhole.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Friendship is blessed on trust, without it there is nothing.