It seems that the creative faculty and the critical faculty cannot exist together in their highest perfection.

No woman is worth more than a fiver unless you're in love with her. Then she's worth all she costs you.

Now the answer ... is plain, but it is so unpalatable that most men will not face it. There is no reason for life and life has no meaning.

You Europeans know nothing about America. Because we amass large fortunes you think we care for nothing but money. We are nothing for it; the moment we have it we spend it, sometimes well, sometimes ill, but we spend it. Money is nothing to us; it's merely the symbol of success. We are the greatest idealists in the world; I happen to think that we've set our ideal on the wrong objects; I happen to think that the greatest ideal man can set before himself is self-perfection.

You tend to close your eyes to truth, beauty and goodness because they give no scope to your sense of the ridiculous.

The humorist has a good eye for the humbug; he does not always recognize the saint.

In heaven, when the blessed use the telephone they will say what they have to say and not a word besides.