If saving money is wrong, I don't want to be right!

Stop and smell the garlic! That's all you have to do.

I hate flying, flat out hate its guts.

Divorce is simply modern society's version of medieval torture. Except it lasts longer and leaves deeper scars. A divorce releases the most primitive emotions; the ugliest, raw feelings. Emotionally wounded people do their best to inflict pain upon the other party, but rather than using claws they use divorce lawyers.

I can't stand the gossip of celebrities' lives, all the time! Every minute!

How do I stay so healthy and boyishly handsome? It's simple. I drink the blood of young runaways.

Everybody has their 15 minutes, and those 15 minutes should be spent in a private limo and a private plane. It's the ultimate.