It's hard for me to know. I'll think, 'I really brought off my ideas, it's great,' and no one sparks to it

As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.

To me there’s no real difference between a fortune teller or a fortune cookie and any of the organized religions. They’re all equally valid or invalid, really. And equally helpful.

You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert.

The meaning of life is that nobody knows the meaning of life.

I am told the settlement of $5 million I am being paid is the largest amount ever paid under the New York right to privacy law

The roe is reputed to sleep for a thousand years and then suddenly rise in flames, particularly if it was smoking when it dozed off.