There's always the standard six people you can hire that have played all these villains in Hollywood. Instinctively, when they come on screen, you know what's going to happen. You don't know the story, but you know what they do.

I can't not put humor in a book.

Even though my father was a radio comedian, it wasn't cool to say, at a young age, 'I want to be a comedian.'

Steven Spielberg seems to have wanted to be a director from 13. He put his dog in a certain position and made him eat at four o'clock. He liked to direct it. But, to me, directing is tedious. Especially if you're acting in it. And I'm inherently lazy.

I'm not Elvis. I don't get chased by paparazzi.

Be generous and you can be the best person who ever lived.

If anything happens to me, tell every woman I've ever gone with I was talking about her at the end. That way, they'll have to reevaluate me.