I always thought communism was crap, really.

I feel sorry for many politicians we expect them to be completely consistent and moralised when we're not.

If I won the lottery I'd start a charity that helped little family hardware stores, cobblers and fruit shops open in city centres.

People aren't universally heroic.

Even a blind dog can find a bone every so often.

A lot of those comics can't hold down relationships and they've got no other life apart from performing. They sleep in their Jags and a lot of them can't even talk. All they can do is tell gags.

Everyone I used to work with is still alive and can afford expensive lawyers.