The overwhelming number of teachers ...are unable to name or describe a theory of learning that underlies what they do.
Alfie KohnThose who know they're valued irrespective of their accomplishments often end up accomplishing quite a lot. It's the experience of being accepted without conditions that helps people develop a healthy confidence in themselves, a belief that it's safe to take risks and try new things.
Alfie KohnYou have to give them unconditional love. They need to know that even if they screw up, you love them. You don't want them to grow up and resent you or, even worse, parent the way you parented them.
Alfie KohnPunishments and rewards are two sides of the same coin and that coin doesn't buy you much.
Alfie Kohn